It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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