She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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