Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Randomize
