I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
