Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
