Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Randomize
