you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize