Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
there is puke in my bra ... again
Randomize
