problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
