I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize
