why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
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