we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
