I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.