carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
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