I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Randomize
