Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
