Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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