I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize
