another moral hangover. fuck.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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