I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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