I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
