Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
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