Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
