i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
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