one two three fourrrrnication!
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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