Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
