She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
