my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
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