Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize