I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
