apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
it's like iHOP with fire
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
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