Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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