She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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