I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
