can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
