too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
It was confusing and full of hummus
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize