none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
You need Xanax blowdarts
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
