hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
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I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
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We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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