Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official drugs can't kill me
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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