they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
