O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
