I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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