I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Randomize
