White coat. Heels.
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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