Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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