I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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