Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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