It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
