So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
