Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I am naked and annoyed.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
