Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize
