just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
You brought string cheese to the strip club
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Randomize